Edward Teach/Calico Jack/Izzy Hands | 7K words | Explicit 🔞
Izzy planned for a quiet night in.
Ed planned to get drunk and have fun.
Jack didn’t have a plan, but he’s good at improvising.
Tags
Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - College/University, Trans Israel Hands, Sub Israel Hands, Insecure Israel Hands, Bottom Israel Hands, Top "Calico" Jack Rackham, Top Blackbeard | Edward Teach, Porn with Feelings, Pining, Established fuck buddies, Drunk Sex, Threesome - M/M/M, Manipulation, Sexual Coercion, Mildly Dubious Consent, Getting Together, First Kiss, Light Dom/sub, Under-negotiated Kink, Dirty Talk, Israel Hands Has a Degradation Kink, Slut Praising, Biting, Hair-pulling, Rough Sex, Accidental Breathplay, Oral Sex, Vaginal Sex, Anal Sex, Spitroasting, Double Penetration in Two Holes, Creampie, Felching, Overstimulation, Multiple Orgasms, Frat boy shenanigans, Warning: Pizza Neglect, Horny Matchmaker Calico Jack, Author is Open to Hearing about Dead Batteries
Izzy Hands POV | 4K words | Mature
TLDR: I'm just trying to do my job but it seems that everybody hates me, AITA?
Edward Teach/Izzy Hands | 2.3K words | Explicit 🔞
After Stede ”Homewrecker” Bonnet is gone and Blackbeard is back, Izzy is determined to return to business as usual. It does not go as planned.
Tags
Post-Season/Series 01, Bottom Israel Hands, Top Blackbeard | Edward Teach, Blow Jobs, Face-Fucking, Face Slapping, Spit As Lube, Anal Sex, Rough Sex, Pain Kink, unrequited feelings, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms, Heavy Drinking, Unhealthy Relationships, Codependency, Angst, Jealousy, Izzy Hands can't read the room, Warning: Does not contain a Happy Ending, Author does not hate Izzy Hands, Author is Open to Hearing about Dead Batteries
Calico Jack/Izzy Hands | 2.3K words | Explicit 🔞
Izzy wants to sleep. Rackham wants to get his dick wet.
Tags
Pre-Canon, Bottom Israel Hands, Top "Calico" Jack Rackham, Intercrural Sex, Anal Sex, Rough Sex, Threesome fantasy, Dirty Talk, more like dirty monologue, degradation kink, Slut Shaming, but the positive kind so is it slut praising?, unrequited feelings, Pining while fucking, Pining While Fucking Someone Else, Under-negotiated Kink, Mildly Dubious Consent, Established fuck buddies, Ambiguous/Open Ending, Calico Jack is not a total dickhead, what if CJ dicks you down so hard you pass out?, despite public demand I refuse to use the words "hefty member" or "horse cock", Author is Open to Hearing about Dead Batteries
Aziraphale/Crowley | 18K words | Explicit 🔞
Five Times Aziraphale and Crowley Had Sex but Not Really and One Time They Actually Did
During the Lockdown, Aziraphale picked up a new hobby: he started writing a book. Erotic literature, to be specific. Unfortunately, the sex scenes were giving him a bit of a trouble, because we all know how hard it is to figure out how human bodies actually work. So, when Crowley finally woke up, Aziraphale asked him to help him with some research.
”Nothing improper, I assure you, and only if you are amenable,” Aziraphale hastily added. ”It’s just that there are some positions I can’t fully describe in writing, because I’m not sure where all the limbs go and which body parts are touching and which aren’t and…”
Tags
Canon Universe, Post-Episode: Good Omens: Lockdown, Crack Treated Seriously, Humor, 5+1 Things, Ineffable Idiots (Good Omens), POV Crowley (Good Omens), Writer Aziraphale (Good Omens), Canon-typical Alcohol Consumption, Frivolous Miracles (Good Omens), Bickering, Pining, Plausible Deniability, False Pretenses, Simulated Sex, Fake Sex, Top Aziraphale (Good Omens), Bottom Crowley (Good Omens), Crowley Has a Penis (Good Omens), Crowley Has A Vulva (Good Omens), Aziraphale Has a Penis (Good Omens), Blow Jobs, Face-Fucking, Come Swallowing, Masturbation, Bathtub Sex, Vaginal Sex, Spanking, Light Dom/sub, Rimming, Anal Sex, Dirty Talk, Creampie, Getting Together, Happy Ending, Author is Open to Hearing about Dead Batteries, Warning: reading this might change how you feel about burritos
Sergeant Shadwell/Madame Tracy | 0.4K words | Teen And Up Audiences
A missing scene set immediately after Sergeant Shadwell had "popped the question".
Aziraphale/Crowley | 2.4K words | Explicit 🔞
There is undeniable chemistry between Toni and Mr Fell, even if it is aided with monetary incentives.
Tags
Crowley Has A Vulva (Good Omens), Aziraphale Has a Penis (Good Omens), Alternate Universe - Human, Alternate Universe - Prostitution, Light BDSM, Dom Aziraphale (Good Omens), Sub Crowley (Good Omens), Public Sex, Clothed Sex, Vaginal Fingering, Gangbang Fantasy, references to all sorts of penetrations & rough sex & spit roasting etc, Wet & Messy, but not really, Dirty Talk, more like dirty monologue, degradation kink, Slut Shaming, but the positive kind so is it slut praising?, Begging, Orgasm Delay/Denial, This fic contains only one (1) bad pun, Author is Open to Hearing about Dead Batteries
Aziraphale/Crowley | 1.7K words | Mature
Crowley’s latest gift to Aziraphale leads to an unexpected* result.
* Unexpected for him. All of you readers already know the endgame for these two.
Aziraphale/Crowley | 4.1K words | Explicit 🔞
Bendy Burglar Barebacked by Bossy Bibliophile
Tags
Crowley Has a Penis (Good Omens), Aziraphale Has a Penis (Good Omens), Top Aziraphale (Good Omens), Bottom Crowley (Good Omens), Cheesy Porn Tropes, Sexual Roleplay, Light BDSM, Dom Aziraphale (Good Omens), Sub Crowley (Good Omens), Aziraphale is Hung, Size Queen Crowley (Good Omens), Safe Sane and Consensual, Consensual Non-Consent, Rape/Non-con Elements, Rough Sex, Banter, Bickering, Some groan-worthy bad puns, Dirty Talk, degradation kink, Slut Shaming, forced stripping, Clothed Sex, Naked/Clothed, Blow Jobs, Face-Fucking, Hair-pulling, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Begging, Orgasm Delay/Denial, Come Eating, Aftercare, Fluffy Ending, The One Where the Burglar Does Not Get Sent Home With Cake, Author is Open to Hearing about Dead Batteries, Creampie
Aziraphale/Crowley | 2.6K words | Explicit 🔞
The new intern at Miss Fell’s office has caught her eye. They’ve been flirting for two weeks. What happens when they get stuck in a lift together?
or: Older Busty Blonde Seduces Hot New Intern
Tags
Non-erotic smut, I mean it this is not a joke, Don’t say I didn’t warn you, Non-Erotic Smut Bingo, Alternate Universe - Human, Alternate Universe - Office, Female Aziraphale (Good Omens), Male Crowley (Good Omens), Age Difference, Trapped In Elevator, Elevator Sex, Flirting, Clothed Sex, Cunnilingus, Blow Jobs, Vaginal Fingering, Vaginal Sex, Penis In Vagina Sex, Rimming, So little rimming it’s barely there, talking about anal sex, Creampie, Come Eating, Wall Sex, Dirty Talk, Bad Dirty Talk, The vocabulary in this fic is extremely questionable, Smut, Some Fluff, Aziraphale is Thirsty, Service Top Crowley (Good Omens), Horny Meet-Cute, No beta this is gonna be horrible anyway, Suddenly a wild schlong appeared, Author is Open to Hearing about Dead Batteries
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Aziraphale/Crowley | 4.1K words | Explicit 🔞
Crowley has trouble voicing his desires. Aziraphale comes up with an incentive.
Tags
Crowley Has a Penis (Good Omens), Crowley Has A Vulva (Good Omens), Aziraphale Has a Penis (Good Omens), He/Him Pronouns For Crowley (Good Omens), He/Him Pronouns For Aziraphale (Good Omens), Top Aziraphale (Good Omens), Bottom Crowley (Good Omens), Light Dom/sub, Gentle Dom Aziraphale (Good Omens), Crowley Loves Aziraphale (Good Omens), Aziraphale Loves Crowley (Good Omens), Established Relationship, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Smut, Shameless Smut, Masturbation, Dirty Talk, Vaginal Fingering, Anal Fingering, Sex Toys, Blow Jobs, Face-Fucking, Hair-pulling, Vaginal Sex, Anal Sex, Love Bites, Orgasm Delay/Denial, Sub Crowley (Good Omens), Come Swallowing, Author is Open to Hearing about Dead Batteries
Aziraphale/Crowley | 2.6K words | Explicit 🔞
Thirsty Redhead Gets Railed By Blond Masseur
Tags
Alternate Universe - Human, Masseur Aziraphale, Crowley Has a Penis (Good Omens), Aziraphale Has a Penis (Good Omens), He/Him Pronouns For Crowley (Good Omens), He/Him Pronouns For Aziraphale (Good Omens), Top Aziraphale (Good Omens), Bottom Crowley (Good Omens), Aziraphale is Hung, Thirsty Crowley (Good Omens), Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Smut, Cheesy Porn Tropes, Massage, Massage parlour, accidental arousal, Accidental Erection, Inappropriate Erections, Unprofessional behaviour, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Begging, Dirty Talk, Horny Meet-Cute, Author is Open to Hearing about Dead Batteries
Aziraphale/Crowley | 2.1K words | Explicit 🔞
Flirty Redhead Secretary Gets Banged By Her Boss
Tags
Crowley Has A Vulva (Good Omens), Aziraphale Has a Penis (Good Omens), She/Her Pronouns for Crowley (Good Omens), He/Him Pronouns For Aziraphale (Good Omens), Top Aziraphale (Good Omens), Bottom Crowley (Good Omens), Crowley Loves Aziraphale (Good Omens), Aziraphale Loves Crowley (Good Omens), Established Relationship, Established Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens), Ineffable Husbands (Good Omens), Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Smut, My First Smut, My First Work in This Fandom, Cheesy Porn Tropes, Dirty Talk, Oral Sex, Blow Jobs, Face-Fucking, Hair-pulling, Vaginal Fingering, Anal Fingering, Vaginal Sex, Clothed Sex, Begging, Desk Sex, Office Sex, Sexual Roleplay, Secretary Crowley (Good Omens), Boss Aziraphale, Boss/secretary roleplay, Author is Open to Hearing about Dead Batteries
Cornelia Hale/Irma Lair | 0.8K words | General Audiences
The girls are having a well-earned pyjama party and watching a Potter movie. "Who do you think is cutest?" -type of discussion ensues.
Cornelia Hale/Irma Lair | 0.5K words | General Audiences
Set right after "Preferences". Irma has to get out of the room ASAP. Later, some eavesdropping ensues.
Cornelia Hale/Irma Lair | 1.2K words | General Audiences
Set right after "Revelations". It's not like you can just talk about your feelings without them affecting your dreams the next night.
Cornelia Hale/Irma Lair | 0.9K words | General Audiences
Set right after "Dreams". Cornelia is still asleep, but not for long.